Forgive and forget… this is a popular line used by lots of people especially when giving advice, but it’s not one that is easily followed.
Forgiving someone who has done something hurtful and bad to us is not easy. But it usually can be done, though it may require some time. Even though we’ve forgiven someone for the wrong they’ve done, we can never really forget, at least not completely. Our mind can be sharp when it comes to these things. Especially if someone has hurt us BIG time. We can never really forget the pain and the fact that it has happened to us.
What’s the difference between forgiving and forgetting, anyway? If you’ve forgiven someone, doesn’t it automatically mean that you’re willing to forget everything that happened? What does forgiveness entail? Forgiveness is a process and it may take a long time, some even take forever before the resentment and the anger subsides. Forgiveness means that you choose not to punish that person because of what that person has done to you. But giving forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to forget.
It’s not a matter of holding a grudge, it’s just that once the damage has been done, it can never be undone. It can be improved and healed, yes, but it can never be undone. In other words, you can forgive the person, but you can’t forget what they did. It will stay with you forever, but what changes is how you deal with your emotions. Over time, the pain, disappointment and anger may diminish. It will come to a point wherein it becomes just a distant thought with no more emotional impact. Nevertheless, it will enter your mind… someday, you’ll look back… especially during the times in your life when you’re forced to recall it. But then you’re in control. Because it doesn’t affect you like it used to. And this is when you can say that you’re stronger, because of what you’ve been through and because of what you had to endure.
That’s why I can say that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with remembering. “Forgive, but never forget“. Now, that’s more like it. Wouldn’t you agree?
Do you find it easy to forgive?
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Thanx dear :-)
This week something interesting happened to me. I made a gift for someone, and they absolutely loved it.
As they exclaimed over it and admired it, they asked if it had taken me long to make. I shrugged and said, "Just a few hours" - when in fact I spent more than 30 hours working on it. I poured a lot of heart and soul into it. Why then, did I diminish it? Why did I feel the need to fib about how much effort I had put into that gift?
I must admit, I had to give that question some long, hard thought. What I realized is that I am still following the pattern that has dominated much of my life. I'm hiding my Light. You know that song, "This Little Light of Mine, I'm Gonna Let It Shine?" How many of us are afraid to let our "lights" shine? How many of us hold back a large part of ourselves?
Maybe we are afraid of being braggarts. Nobody likes a boastful, prideful person. From a young age, our parents teach us modesty and humility, which is not a bad thing in itself. But where do we draw the line? Are we not allowed to take pride in our own accomplishments at all?
There is a very big difference between sharing our gifts with the world, and showing off. When I look back across my life, I see a classic underachiever. Not because I wasn't capable of achieving anything, but because I was ashamed and embarrassed by my own abilities and strengths.
I denied them and hid them at every available opportunity. If I shared those gifts with the world, it would call attention to me, attention I didn't feel worthy of accepting.
Perhaps I was also afraid of ridicule. If I shared my heart and soul with the world, would I be laughed at or made fun of? Nothing could shoot my confidence down more quickly than rejection.
Maybe you've had the same experiences? Have you had feelings of hesitancy about sharing your gifts? Have you been hiding your light, holding back an essential part of yourself?
How dare we hide our Lights? They are not ours to hide. They were given to us by a loving God of Light (whatever your perception of "God" may be) - the same light that shines within us. Each of us has a little spark of the Divine within.
By denying that part of ourselves, we also deny God within us! We have a responsibility to share ourselves with the world; not in a way that proclaims us to be better than anyone else, but in a way that uplifts and enriches others.
We owe it to ourselves, we owe it to the world, and we owe it to God, the one who gave us these gifts and abilities to begin with.
What good is a gift that doesn't get used? Imagine a flower being afraid to bloom, rain being afraid to fall, the sun being afraid to shine. We need to shift our perspective and realize that by hiding our lights, we are not serving anyone. Love, unexpressed, is not love at all.
So many of us think that we have nothing to share. We spend most of our days feeling like an empty shell. However, nothing is truly ever empty. Nature abhors a vacuum. Ah, remember that, from Science class? ;-)
Though you may feel empty, there is something inside of you. It may be chaos or joy, optimism or pessimism, hope or doubt - but something is there. If you don't like what it is, you have the ability to change it by the power of your thoughts.
Know that you do have something to share with the world. If you will dare to reach down inside your soul and feel around a bit, you will find a long forgotten dream. A sense of excitement that you once had, a knowingness that you could change the world and make it just a little bit brighter.
Reclaim that dream. It never really left you, it just got covered with a little dust. Clean it off and set it upon your mantle of hope. Infuse it with new life, and allow it to come into Being.
Remember that you are the only one holding yourself back.
As they exclaimed over it and admired it, they asked if it had taken me long to make. I shrugged and said, "Just a few hours" - when in fact I spent more than 30 hours working on it. I poured a lot of heart and soul into it. Why then, did I diminish it? Why did I feel the need to fib about how much effort I had put into that gift?
I must admit, I had to give that question some long, hard thought. What I realized is that I am still following the pattern that has dominated much of my life. I'm hiding my Light. You know that song, "This Little Light of Mine, I'm Gonna Let It Shine?" How many of us are afraid to let our "lights" shine? How many of us hold back a large part of ourselves?
Maybe we are afraid of being braggarts. Nobody likes a boastful, prideful person. From a young age, our parents teach us modesty and humility, which is not a bad thing in itself. But where do we draw the line? Are we not allowed to take pride in our own accomplishments at all?
There is a very big difference between sharing our gifts with the world, and showing off. When I look back across my life, I see a classic underachiever. Not because I wasn't capable of achieving anything, but because I was ashamed and embarrassed by my own abilities and strengths.
I denied them and hid them at every available opportunity. If I shared those gifts with the world, it would call attention to me, attention I didn't feel worthy of accepting.
Perhaps I was also afraid of ridicule. If I shared my heart and soul with the world, would I be laughed at or made fun of? Nothing could shoot my confidence down more quickly than rejection.
Maybe you've had the same experiences? Have you had feelings of hesitancy about sharing your gifts? Have you been hiding your light, holding back an essential part of yourself?
How dare we hide our Lights? They are not ours to hide. They were given to us by a loving God of Light (whatever your perception of "God" may be) - the same light that shines within us. Each of us has a little spark of the Divine within.
By denying that part of ourselves, we also deny God within us! We have a responsibility to share ourselves with the world; not in a way that proclaims us to be better than anyone else, but in a way that uplifts and enriches others.
We owe it to ourselves, we owe it to the world, and we owe it to God, the one who gave us these gifts and abilities to begin with.
What good is a gift that doesn't get used? Imagine a flower being afraid to bloom, rain being afraid to fall, the sun being afraid to shine. We need to shift our perspective and realize that by hiding our lights, we are not serving anyone. Love, unexpressed, is not love at all.
So many of us think that we have nothing to share. We spend most of our days feeling like an empty shell. However, nothing is truly ever empty. Nature abhors a vacuum. Ah, remember that, from Science class? ;-)
Though you may feel empty, there is something inside of you. It may be chaos or joy, optimism or pessimism, hope or doubt - but something is there. If you don't like what it is, you have the ability to change it by the power of your thoughts.
Know that you do have something to share with the world. If you will dare to reach down inside your soul and feel around a bit, you will find a long forgotten dream. A sense of excitement that you once had, a knowingness that you could change the world and make it just a little bit brighter.
Reclaim that dream. It never really left you, it just got covered with a little dust. Clean it off and set it upon your mantle of hope. Infuse it with new life, and allow it to come into Being.
Remember that you are the only one holding yourself back.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
perkiraan manusia
if 1 batang = 1 jam 14 batang = 14 jam 1 kotak = 14 batang 1 hari = 1 kotak so 1 hari = 14 jam if 1 org = 67 tahun 1 tahun = 365 hari so 1 tahun = 5110 jam skrg 22 tahun 67-22= 45 so 45x 5110 = 229950 jam if convert kepada tahun 229950/(365x24)=26.25 tahun so yang masih tinggal ...
one of the calculation made by human being. instead of calculate this, use this ability to plan our future systemically. we will have bright future :-)
one of the calculation made by human being. instead of calculate this, use this ability to plan our future systemically. we will have bright future :-)
Friday, March 26, 2010
Bismillah..
sume org asyik berkata ttg blog..cerita baru, cerita lama, cerita hangat, cerita sejuk..semua ada..ini dia, blog dari Dr Shim, menjanjikan kisah2 menarik yg boleh dijadikan teladan dan juga sempadan..InsyaAllah..
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